I'm a Type A personality to the 'T'. I love plans...plans that are made in advance and not the last second. I also love lists (my whole life has at some point been on sheet of paper in bulleted format). And I really love being organized, especially when it comes to events/big things that are happening. So when I say I have a plan for my wedding and I am trying to keep everything organized, it's no joke that I really am. But I'm struggling lately to keep up with the demands I have placed on myself. Luckily, I got so many "to-dos" accomplished right after the engagement, and that has been a lifesaver. Now though, with four months and a week left until the big day, I am overwhelmed with what still needs to be done. I am pretty sure I have a million different copies of the same To-Do List scattered around in binders, folders, notebooks, and pockets. On a Tuesday I've lost the list, started a new one on Wednesday, only to find the original on Thursday. I have so many half-finished lists that I don't know what to do with myself. And every time I think I will condense it down to just one list, I get sidetracked or forget altogether. So each time I find a list, I get reminded of what hasn't been done or what never made it onto the most current list. Keeping up with me?? I know it's chaos.
Having said all of this, today I have been working on a seating chart for the reception. Not knowing who is coming, but only who is invited, I wanted to stay ahead of the game and try to set it up now with the information I have. So hours, on InDesign, later and I still haven't narrowed it down that well. If Pete hadn't stepped in to make me relax, my computer might have ended up out the window and three stories down (okay, not really, but close). Because I am trying to stay ahead, keep up, and outdo myself, I have put so much unnecessary pressure on myself. I keep freaking myself out with thinking I will forget a crucial element or a part that I really want to include. My intention is to keep the stress lower when the wedding gets that much closer, having already gotten a foot in the door with the plans. However, I'm thinking the opposite is actually happening. What I really need to do is breathe and trust the man upstairs will guide me through this like only He can do. Oh wedding planning, I have such a love/hate relationship with you. But, I know regardless of how this planning/organizing/list-making turns out, I still get to marry my best friend. And there's nothing to stress over about that :)
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